But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
1 Timothy 5:8
I wrote yesterday’s post trying to lay down 5 truths that need to be understood in order to combat Patriarchal Theology. It is man’s depraved nature to think that he is king, ruler, and essentially a Demi-god of his home. In the worst of cases, he rapes, kills, and destroys as long as he can get away with it. In the best of cases, he is a sheepish, benign dictator whom no one would suspect is inwardly a ravenous wolf. In either case, a man who loves the doctrine of Patriarchy, as described in the previous post, is a man to be guarded against. He is a dangerous man. He is capable of rationalizing anything as long as his lusts are satisfied. All sense of normalcy, decency, and social etiquette is lost and the result is a man who rules in his own little world. In his mind, he is the best of all men. In the mind of the sane, he is a small package all wrapped up in himself.
One thing I have noticed of these kinds of men, is that they love money. That only makes sense because it is money that allows him to buy people, possessions, and pleasure. Without money, he cannot afford to express himself. And, without money, few would take him seriously. After all, who doesn’t regard the wealthy, or pseudo-wealthy, as important?
Men like this take their money and spend it upon themselves. They privately hoard their pleasures and hide from accountability. They would rather use money to buy influence than eat regularly. If they had to choose, they would spend all their money on the most expensive items that will bring them regard than they would the care of others. And that brings us to our passage.
Paul wrote to Timothy to be on guard against the elders win the church (1 Timothy 1:3-7). Timothy will have to enter Ephesus and clean up the church after the destruction of the leadership who, Paul had warned years earlier, wanted to draw away disciples after themselves (Acts 20:29-30). Over time, these rulers would feel the surge of leadership in that all eyes are on them. They feel important before the people, never mind if they are unqualified to actually be there. These men love this preeminence.
3 John 9 (NASB95)
I wrote something to the church; but Diotrephes, who loves to be first among them, does not accept what we say.
3 John 9
Paul, then, writes to Timothy to watch out for guys in the church who refuse to support their households. Thus, Paul’s strong language makes sense. Timothy will need to hit these men hard in their dereliction of duty to care for their homes.
The Greek text reads like this:
“But, if a certain man does not show regard for his own ones, even especially (those) of his own household, he denies the faith and he is worse/more severe than an unbeliever/unfaithful (man).”
1 Timothy 5:8 (my translation)
Most people read that verse and think, “A man who does not make enough money for his home is an unbeliever.” That is not what it says. Paul does not say that a man has to make a lot of money. In fact, money has nothing to do with the point of this injunction. Further, Jesus Himself became poor in order to make many rich, but not monetarily (2 Corinthians 8:9).
What this says is that a man who neglects, doesn’t care about, the needs of his household, even the widows of his home, is rejecting the very tenet of being a Christian, while affirming his faith in Jesus which is to love one another (John 13:34). A man who takes the money, and possessions, meant for the well-being and needs of his widows and family is rejecting love for his most intimate of relationships, something that even unbelievers don’t do. Most people in the world provide for their own, although many don’t. However, especially in leadership, a man should never be found to reject the needs of the people in his care for the sake of satisfying himself.
I know of a number of women who married a man only to find out later he had run up an exorbitant credit card bill on pornographic material, immoral behaviors, even reaching into the drug world. These men are drunks and bums, although they have a day job. The wife then inherits that debt and is forced to work. The man subsequently divorces her and leaves her to pay everything back. Him, being the main wage-earner, is not afraid of the debt. He is blinded by his lust and continues his pursuit. But she, the one who trusted him and gave her life to him, is destroyed and the needs of the children now rest on her shoulders. This is in the church. This is even in leadership.
Men like these behave worse than unbelievers. Their behavior, fueled by their lust hidden behind Patriarchy, is justifiable in their minds. In the world, he is celebrated. In the church, the place where men are supposed to die trying to support their families if need be, he is putting up a front and behind the scenes doing this…he behaves worse than an unbeliever who makes no pretense of righteousness.
Again, men have authority. They have a right to rule. You had better try to hold back the tide as to hold back a man’s sense of authority. However, this authority has, from creation, been for the good of others and not for the good of himself. Men, THAT is what authority is for.
Sketches of Scripture 